How to Speak Instagram

My passive-aggressive hate love letter to “Instagram Culture”!

  • Address women as any of the following: Babe, Beautiful
  • If too cowardly to just be straight-forward, be passive aggressive instead and use emojis as well as an overly positive tone
  • You may also use multiple kissing emojis to try and hide said passive aggression (this is not guaranteed to work)
  • When sending a professional, business email to women from Instagram, begin your emails with the following greetings: “Hi Beautiful!”, “Hey Beautiful!”
  • Assume the person you’re speaking to is a dumb as rocks

In all seriousness, I enjoy Instagram as a creative outlet and have met many wonderful people on there.

But…I have a lot of gripes with it.

So more tips on how to become Instagram-savvy to come next time as my hypocritical ass continues to use this website!

Thanks for reading ❤

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2 thoughts on “How to Speak Instagram

  1. HAHAHA! But I find usually the person I’m speaking too on Instagram is dumb as rocks!

    There are people who follow me on instagram from this blog, and they’re usually pretty legit. But the random people that I stumble across on instagram from instagram… they’re usually a few bricks short of a load. lol

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is funny! Really lol-ed at some of them. I tend to avoid those kinda accounts but obviously you can’t help the ones who try and slide into your DMs. I get some really weird ppl trying to talk to me at times but I usually just delete/ignore the chats and they won’t contact again.


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